Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Stray Thoughts

Since the early days, I have always been a writer. Maybe not a very good one, but I have wasted many pages scribbling gibberish in notebooks as a child, and I think I have improved a little, graduating to writing children’s stories. Surprisingly, a piece of paper and pen attracts me more than a TV. I can’t say why. But the thing is that I have always been writing, and it is something beyond a hobby, because recently, I discovered that I can’t live without it. When I was a little younger, my ambition was to become a journalist. All that changed on a memorable day when my English teacher, Mr. AK asked us to write a formal letter, and said that he would pick a student to read it in front of the whole class. I was picked, and later my letter was rated as a 4/10. That was the least anyone got, and from that day, my dream lay shattered.

Well, still, I continued to write, because of the fun of it, never taking writing too seriously. But this year is testing me. It is hard to give up something you love doing. I’m in the second year PU, the “tough” “life-changing” year…and sitting and writing essays is considered wasteful, almost sinful too. Today, we had an English Creative Writing competition in college, and I have a Major test on Saturday. The competition was easy and had just my kind of topics, but it was after college hours, and my hands were twitching to write…but there was also this guilt that I would not study for the test. It took me all my self-control to resist the temptation of participating, so I went straight home and started studying. But I guess the regret is haunting me now, and even concentrating is difficult. I have tried to give up writing because it wastes my time, but it is impossible. You see, because of my regret, I sneaked in 5 minutes from my study time to write this. And after writing, I am a little more satisfied. My regret is dissolving, little by little. Now, I can return to work with a smile. Goodbye!


RK said...

firstly, this is a great piece because it is straight from the heart.
second: always follow your heart.
you write really well. the very fact that you have written this fantastic post proves my point. remember - RK Narayan failed in English. and didn't the world crave for his writings?
last but not the least: you are in a crucial phase of life - if you study well this year, you can live comfortably all your life. but that does not mean you do not pursue your interests.
keep writing. it is a great way of expressing oneself.
wish you all the best in your future endeavours
take care and regards

Lakshmi Bharadwaj said...

Well, this is my question. To be or not to be?...somehow, because of the tutions and classes,and even some classmates, who scare me(they say they study 6 hours a day), now I don't want to be out of the crowd, I know I need to study. But what I mean is that I might not give up blogging completely...just that I might become a little more infrequent, that's all. I know I need to give up some things this year, and it hurts me, (like participating in competiotions, extracirriculars, holidays, visits to mysore), but I have become a faithful blogger. EVen though I don't find the time to post every week, I might do it once a month. So, don't worry, I'm not giving up that easily. ;)

ER Ramachandran said...

Do write everyday, if possible, or atleast once a week.It will help you in more ways than one. Your thoughts get organised better which will be useful to your academic work too; It will help you to concentrate and remain focussed, which we all need when we are studying.Lastly, since you enjoy writing, you will feel good.And when you feel good that's half the job already done! Now, you can handle, any subject, situation very well.So, please do write regularly. Wish you all the best!